If your child is struggling with sleep (either problems fall asleep, or staying asleep) they may benefit from sleep training. Cry-it-out (also known as CIO or extinction sleep training) is the most famous flavor of sleep training. It definitely works (and entails less crying than parents think) it’s not for everyone. “Camping out” sleep training, also known as the “chair method”, “sleep lady shuffle” or extinction with parental presence, is a technique work well for families who want to stay with their child during the training process.
If you have a young infant and you want to go more quickly, here’s my comprehensive guide to extinction / cry it out sleep training.
What Is Camping Out Sleep Training?
Like all sleep training methods, “camping out” sleep training (which I will refer to simply as camping out for simplicity) is a technique for teaching your child to fall asleep independently. It is actually a form of extinction sleep training— extinction meaning that you are.
Note that I did not come up with the term “camping out”. I believe it was Dr. Harriet Hiscock in Australia who introduced the term.
Strengths
- Gentler than regular extinction/CIO
- Works well with anxious kids and parents
- Generally less crying (but not necessarily NO crying)
- Works well with older kids, not just babies
Weaknesses
- Takes longer to implement than CIO
- Time consuming and thus difficult to implement in the middle of the night
- There are some clear sticking points (see below)
Which Children Benefit from Camping Out?
I actually like camping out for a pretty broad range of kids. You can use it with infants (starting from 4-6 months of age which is the sleep training window). It can work well for toddlers and preschoolers (or even nervous elementary schoolers as well, although other techniques like the Yale Plan to Get Your Child to Sleep in His Own bed will work better for school age kids and up (about three quarters down the page in this article on stopping cosleeping).
What to do before sleep training
Like all sleep training techniques, you want to make sure you have a set bedtime every night, with a set bedtime routine.
Pick a night to start and have a good plan. Fridays nights work well. Don’t start if you have travel plans in the next month.
Guiding Principles
Like all extinction methods, you are working to get rid of a behavior (in this case, your child needing you present to fall asleep and stay asleep) by reducing the amount of attention you provide to your child at bedtime. (To understand why this works, read this post on breaking bad sleep habits in kids). CIO is a brute force method— you are essentially placing your child in the crib. In camping out, you are staying with your child but providing the minimum amount of interaction.
How to performing camping out.
No matter the age of your child, here is the most critical part: although you are present, the goal of this method is still removal of your involvement for sleep onset. This means that you will need to provide minimal attention to your child. You should not get in a discussion with your child, but simply sit with her and repeat your final bedtime cue: “I love you. It’s time to go to sleep. Good night.” The interaction you provide should be basic and boring. It’s even ok to read your kindle or your phone (or pretending to be asleep.
Infant protocol (ages 4-12 months)
For infants, the procedure is pretty simple. You will simply just move a mattress into your baby’s room. You will be in there for about a week.
- Perform your bedtime routine and place your child in the crib drowsy but awake.
- Lie down on the mattress near your child’s crib and pretend to be asleep. They may cry but usually less than with CIO.
- When your child goes to sleep, you can leave the room.
- Go to bed in your child’s room.
- If your child is crying excessively you can calm them down a bit and put them down.
- Usually sleep will improve within four days. By night eight you should be able to return to your own room.
- If there is an uptick in crying when you move out you can move back into her room for a few nights.
If this feels too difficult, you can adapt the chair method as noted below.
Toddler/Preschooler Method— the Chair Method (1 year- 5 years)
As with infants, you will stay in your child’s room until he falls asleep.
For toddlers (and especially kids in beds who can get up and leave), the general principle is the same, but the execution is slightly different.
Just as previously described, you will stay in your child’s room until he falls asleep. Over the course of a week or two, you will gradually increase your distance from your child’s bed.
Older kids may need more of an explanation for why you are sitting there ignoring them. Otherwise, the five-year-old is going to give you a look that says, “What the hell are you doing?” The time to have the conversation about what you are doing and why should occur well before bedtime. My older son was like a tiny lawyer who would interrogate me whenever we we implemented any sort of change in the rules. Be open about the fact that you know he is a big kid but needs a little help falling asleep. It’s fine to say that you have to do a bit of work while you are waiting for him to fall asleep. This is one of the few situations where it would be OK for you to sit with your phone while ignoring your child. Make sure you have the brightness turned down, and recognize that this initially may be distracting to your child.
You should not engage in conversation after lights out; simply repeat your bedtime mantra: “I love you. It’s time to go to sleep. Good night.”
Every few days, when your child has begun to fall asleep fairly easily, you can move a step further out. Each step should take about two to five days. After one night of sleep onset within fifteen minutes of lights-out, you can move to the next step. Here’s a sample schedule based on making changes every three days.
- Days 1–3: You stand by his crib and rub his back.
- Days 4–6: You sit by your child’s bedside but do not touch him.
- Days 7–9: You move your chair to midway between your child’s bedside and the door.
- Days 10–12: You sit in your chair by the door to the room.
- Days 13–15: You sit outside the door but where your child can still see you.
- Days 16–18: You sit out of sight but provide verbal reassurance, either by sitting just outside the room or by using a two-way monitor.
When To Start Training
Before you start, make sure you have a set bedtime routine at a consistent time. Usually I recommend starting when you have a month of time without planned interruptions (vacations, visits from relatives, moving house, etc.) Here’s an article on when not to sleep train.
When To Stop Training
When your child is falling asleep independently OR you have been doing this for a week with no progress.
What do you do if your child wakes up in the middle of the night?
If you like, you can repeat whatever you are doing at bedtime. So if you are sitting two feet from your child’s bed, you can go back in and stay until he falls back asleep.
HOWEVER, given the fact that this is a gentler, slower method, you might be up in the middle of the night frequently if you do so. I also think it is OK to do whatever you need to do to soothe your child back to sleep quickly so you can go back to bed.
As with all sleep training techniques, the goal is to have your child fall asleep without you present. Once you do so, the night time awakenings tend to improve over several weeks.
Sticking points
Usually the most difficult step is when you are no longer in the view of your child. If your child is crying at this point, you have two options. You can move back to an earlier step (such as moving your chair back into the room) for longer— up to seven days).
Alternatively, for older children (three and up) if your child is in a bed and following you out of the room, you can do what my mentor Dr. Judy Owens recommends. Tell your child you need to do some work while he is falling asleep, but that you can’t get interrupted. If your child will not stay in his bed, leave the room and close the door for one minute. When you open the door, the expectation is that he is back in his bed. If he is not, close the door for two minutes. Repeat as necessary, adding a minute each time, until your child is in bed when you reopen the door. As you can imagine, this can get ugly on the first few nights you try it. There can be some crying, or even an extinction burst, as this is an extinction-based method (you are ignoring behaviors you don’t like).
I don’t really recommend this for children who are very anxious or who struggle with attachment, as it can be very traumatic.
For older children who are very anxious, I would recommend “The Yale Plan for Getting Your Kid To Sleep In His Own Bed” in this post.
What to expect
Generally this method will take 2-4 weeks to get your child to fall asleep independently. Once she is doing so, night time awakenings will typically drop out in 2-4 weeks.
Further reading
If you are looking for a comprehensive guide on how to implement camping out, as well as understanding all of the other steps required for a successful sleep plan, I highly recommend checking out my book It’s Never Too Late to Sleep Train: The Low Stress Way to High-Quality Sleep for Babies, Kids, and Parents(affiliate link). It is chock full of high quality info so you and your child can start sleeping better ASAP.
More reading:
Sleep Training Truths: What Science Can (And Can’t) Tell Us About Crying It Out
The Australian government’s article on camping out
What is camping out in sleep training?
Meta: Discover the gentle magic of camping out sleep training! A tear-free approach to peaceful nights, using extinction with parental presence.
This was very helpful. I’m starting tonight. Thank you!
Best of luck!
We are going to attempt this as well! Combined with a slightly later bedtime – I hope this works for our 2 year old.
I hope so too! Best of luck and thanks for reading.
My 20 month daughter was sleep trained as a baby and has been sleeping independently for a year. Suddenly for the past month she refuses to sleep on her own and cries and I have to stay in the room and hold her hand or back till she falls asleep. After reading your advice I tried the gradual retreat but on day 4 where I am not supposed to touch her she cries till she vomits. Today being day 5 she screamed so much that she vomitted all over her clothes and bed. Then I had to clean her up and I put her back down and put my hand on her back till she calmed down then removed my hand and sat next to her crib till she fell asleep. Could you please share some advice? Thanks and Best.
Tough situation. It’s hard for me to troubleshoot this here. Worth taking a break and exploring this with your pediatrican and ruling out any medical cause.
Really interesting video – we are dealing with a 22 month old who always fell asleep on her own from the time she was very little – now all of a sudden one of us has to sit or lie on the other bed in room for her to fall asleep even at nap time! She still will wake up once a night and demands a bottle and then won’t sleep again until we sit there. We are exhausted and at a loss for how to deal with this as we have never had this challenge. We will try this method and see how it works…..
The key is having any interaction being boring and repetitive eg saying “I love you, it’s time to go to sleep” over and over. I also wonder about the bottle. If there is milk in it there may be a component of learned hunger prompting the awakening.
Thanks Dr Craig – actually I worry about the bottle to be honest – we were trying to break her off it and then she got very sick and now I feel that is a bad pattern that we need to deal with as well but not sure if we do it cold turkey or gradually….thanks for your advice very much appreciated!
I have been working on this method for the last 5 nights and it takes my twins anywhere from 1 hr.10 min to 1 hr 55 min. to go to sleep. Does it normally take this long? I tried delaying their bedtime by 45 min. last night and it still took 1 hr.33 min. Do you have any advice for a mom of twins and the camping out method? They are sleeping in the same room in different beds. I am following this method to a T with no eye contact, no responding, etc. Thanks in advance!
I would make sure that they are getting up at the same time every day and not simply shifting their bedtime. Also, are they catching any “sneaky sleep” in the afternoon after, say, 3 PM?
Thanks for your reply! The girls don’t get “sneaky sleep,” but their nap time will go past 3pm, sometimes even until 4:30pm. They wake up at the same time Monday-Thurs, but they sleep in from Friday-Sunday (about an hour later). From Monday-Thurs, my mother -in-law watches them and has trouble with an earlier nap time, but when I’m home Fri-Sun, I put them down for a nap around 12:30pm.
Also, one of the girls gets out of bed while I’m “camping out” and right when I stand up to put her back in bed, she squeals with delight and runs back to her pillow. The only way I can prevent this is to sit on the edge of her bed and when she even sits up, putting her back in the laying position. Is this the right way to handle this? She gets frustrated after about 5 minutes of this and calms down, all the while yelling “MAMA, BE NICE!” Haha.
Thanks again for your advice. It’s amazing that you’re accessible and willing to help the sleep deprived parents in need!
My husband and I have been trying this method for almost a week. Our daughter wakes up after 2 hours crying, “Mommy help me!” and insists that I help her with her blanket. I have noticed that if I do help her she falls back to sleep without much fuss within 5 minutes and if I don’t help her she cries, “Mommy help me! for about 20 minutes to an hour, gives up and pulls her blanket on herself and falls asleep. My husband thinks I should just let her cry and not say anything to her. We both work full time morning jobs and I’m also 6 months pregnant and feel that the sooner I get her to fall asleep, the more sleep everyone (esp. me) can get, the better. What should I do?
I forgot to mention she is 2 1/2
Honestly, if she goes back to sleep on her own, I would ignore it as I suspect doing this consistently will extinguish this in a few days.
Hi Dr! We have been working on this with my 2 yr old son for the past three weeks. We’ve moved from the chair to the door and outside the door however he is still waking at night and insists that we sit outside his door until he falls asleep. Is seems like there is no end in sight. Once we agree to sit he falls asleep quickly but will likely wake up a few hours later and we start all over again. Do you have any advice? Thanks 🙂
Perhaps adding another step, like being on the same floor when he falls asleep, may be helpful
Thanks for your reply! We are directly down the hall from him once we leave his room. We can hear him and he can hear us. The main problem is that when he wakes in the night, he cries out and we have to do it all over again. He is waking 2-3 times a night.
Hello Dr.,
I am a mom from Germany and found this article very interesting. We want to try it with our 8month old daughter since sleepin is very difficult for her and startet yesterday. Altough she is used to her crib, when I put her in her bed awake after reading and cuddling, she started crying at once. I stayed on the matress next to her, sometimes humming or patting her back andg giving her back her pacifier. But she became extremely upset, cried hysterically and even stood up a few times. After one hour (!) of loud screamin she fell asleep with me caressing her and while sucking her pacifier. Is it normal that a baby gets so upset with a parent in the room (with CIO, she ot even more hysterical and we did not feel comfortable). Or should I lay her down more drowsy?
You write that at night, we should simply act like normal. What about daytime naps? And what I wonder as well: She goes to bed at about 7 pm but gets a last feeding at 10:00 pm. Should we do sleep training after this feeding, even if it takes 1 hour again?
I hope my English is ok and am looking forward to your answer.
Thank you!
A later bedtime may be helpful for this (by 30 minutes). I would also question the need for a 10 pm dream feed at 8 months if she is growing well. I might skip it. good luck!
Dear Dr.
I am having great luck with this, but I modify it a bit with my 2 yrs old. We have a very good pre-bed routine, and as I put him in his crib I asked if it would be ok if I took a nap in the chair in his room. Of course he said yes. I cover my body with a blanket, and act asleep. Of course he stood and came and looked at me. He was quite entertained by it all. I reminded him that I needed to nap, as did he, and he needed to lay down and take his nap. He wanted to cooperated and hit the mattress fast. I think there have been a few times that I ‘threatened’ that I could not stay in the room and get my nap if he was going to be up and moving around, and certainly not crying. I also hug him and tell him I love him much at the beginning. But, Mommy needs her rest. Next step is I put him in his crib, but say I have to leave for a minute and go potty. I come back, and go through the nap routine. I make the departure a little longer. I also leave the door open a crack. Now I am saying I say I have to take a shower. He hears the shower. I always say that I can only come back if he is laying down resting and getting ready to nap. Sometimes I give verbal support from the bathroom. He has fallen asleep while I have ‘been in the shower.’ If not, then I come back and go thru the nap routine. I hope to seal this by saying that I need to nap in my bed, which is right next door, but will come in and check on him. He used to be a child that screamed as soon as you walked away from the crib, and that cycle is broken. When it is time to wake up, he does wake up crying, and we are working on that. He didn’t used to. He used to wake and play or babble in his crib., but sleep regressed when I went back to work. We do talk about sleep and how we all do it, need it, grow with it, etc. Do you think that I ‘threaten’ to leave if he does not cooperate with trying to nap is ok? It sure works, but it sounds a bit like a power play and I am worried. I say I would leave only because I cannot sleep in the room unless he is trying to as well. Not punishment or anything. He definitely goes to sleep the fastest…within minutes sometimes….when I just sit and act asleep. Taking longer with the exits, but at least he is content and quiet and trying. Appreciate any comments.
Overall it sounds like things are going well. Keep doing what you are doing.
Hi Dr. Canapari,
I have a wonderful 6 month old who is not the greatest sleeper. The main challenge is frequent nighttime waking. We (the very tired parents!) were happy to see your video and to begin trying the “camping out” method last night. He did eventually go down, but as per usual, he woke frequently crying in the night (we have him well covered on eating, including a dream feed, so hunger isn’t the issue). Your explanation of the “camping out” method for the initial bedtime is clear and really helpful. I would really appreciate knowing how the “camping out” method advises parents handle frequent nighttime wakings.
Thank you!
Just stick with bedtime. Once he is falling asleep on his own the nocturnal awakenings will get better with time. I will also discuss with your pediatrician if your 6 month old still needs to feed at night.
Hi! My 2.4 year old son has been difficult to get to sleep most of his life (though it was much easier when he would nurse before bed). We’ve been co-sleeping since he was born, and he sleeps touch us.
Two nights ago, I started camping out method. A big problem is that he’s in a toddler bed- and right when his nodding off, he jumps up and crawls onto my lap. I’ve been putting him back in his bed but then he grabs my arm. Should I move farther?
Hi Dr. Canapari,
I’m a Family Physician from Toronto and I TOTALLY agree that most of the advice I was giving about sleep before having my own baby was pretty useless! I really appreciate your evidence based approach (works for my scientific brain!). We have started sleep training with my 6 month old, the first night she cried for 2.5 hours, I left the house while my husband listened. Eventually he picked her up and she fell asleep instantly in his arms. The second night I decided to camp-out and sat with my hand on her tummy – she fell asleep after about 40 min of crying. The third night she cried for 2 hours with my hand on her – eventually my husband picked her up and again, she fell asleep when he held her for a moment. She slept well through the night each time, but I thought the bedtime process should be getting shorter/easier! We will try a later bedtime (currently 7:30) and waking her up consistently instead of letting her catch up on sleep in the morning but I wonder if its ok for her to be awake from 4pm to 8pm at her age? Also, should we try this method for naps as well, or just stick to bedtime for now?
I’d really appreciate your thoughts. Thanks again for the excellent resource!
I found this video very helpful. My daughter can fall asleep on her own and pretty quickly, too. However, she keeps waking up at night 2-3 times and asking me to come back to her room. Any suggestions?
Thanks! If she just started falling asleep on her own, I would give it time. If not, here is a list of reasons why she may still be waking up.
Hi,
We did the camping out method for two weeks and everything was O.K since today. Today I had to leave my son with my aunt asking her not letting him nap until 1 p.m. and he took the nap for 30 mins without me being told. So when I tried putting him for afternoon nap he refused and cried for over 30 min so I had to took him for a stroller ride and tried a couple more things but none worked.
for bedtime since he was super tired he went to sleep easy but woke up around 1 a.m. and cried hysterically for 1 hour until I had to take him out of the crib. so He slept in my arm. I waited so long before taking him out but he was crying so bad for one hour with no stop. So what should I do? does it mean that I failed the whole training?
appreciate your help.
I would not lose hope given one bad night after a disruption in routine. Keep doing what worked previously. Good luck.
Hi dr!!!! I am really desperate by now.. My son slept good and on his own since he was about a year. He is 23 month now. However when he hit about 21 month he stopped going to sleep on his own and started waking up at night again. That was also around the time we moved and he started teething. The last 8 weeks I had been trying everything. A few weeks ago I came across this website and made sure to have a good routine and have no disruption reasons for him. Started this technique a few weeks ago. Now he falls asleep fairly quick. Only have to put him back to bed 3-5 times. However for example last night (and this is how it has been going every night) he went to sleep after putting him back to bed 5 times. Slept until 11 and comes in my bedroom waking me up. So then I put him back to bed and do the same thing I do at bed time. However this time it takes 3 hours before he goes back to sleep and when I woke up at 7 this morning I see that he snugged back into my bedroom and was sleeping on the floor in front of my bed which must have happens after 530 this morning as I was awake for a minute then and he was not in my room at that time. I don’t know what to do anymore. Do you have any suggestions?? Thank you!
This may be simply a prolonged extinction burst so I might give it a bit more time. If this does not resolve I would check with the pediatrician and make sure that there are no medical issues.
Hi Dr Canapari, you mentioned in your video that this method is supported by evidence. I’m doing an assignment on sleep methods, do you think you could direct me towards the studies or articles you were referring to? Thank you so much!
The technical term is “extinction with parental presence”. One place to start is the scientific study which I link to in this article.